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Soul Guidance with Carol Mary

Here you will find all the information you need on love, twin flame love and life

The unbiased truth about the sleeper Twin Flame

5/10/2016

11 Comments

 
What or who is the sleeper twin flame?

More commonly known in Twin Flame circles as the runner Twin Flame ~ By definition a runner is a person who runs, especially in a specified way.  (google dictionary) In the case of twin flames, it is the one who runs away from the relationship, the one who does not want to deal with the obstacles that are in the way. Obstacles can be defined as issues such as trust, unconditional love, faith in the relationship and spiritual matters.

Once you connect with your twin you may feel an intensity like no other, you will want to spend as much time with this person, part of you will not be able to understand the reasoning behind why you feel this way at first. You may feel instant love, a need to be there for them always and an obsession with how they are doing or where they are at any given time.  It is something that you can not explain to friends and family.  You will keep much of this emotion inside of you. This emotion can build up and make you feel awful.  At times you may even believe that you are crazy to feel or think this way.  

So which one of you will be the sleeper?

The simple answer is the one who can not deal with the intensity.  The runner twin is typically the male.  I have come across some females but they are few and far between. Sleeper twins can be very stubborn and set in their ways.  

The main symptoms of a sleeper - is this you?

  • Shows fear mostly that you will hurt them, or you will leave them
  • Anxiety when it comes to dealing with issues that arise between you
  • Very little understanding of the relationship or why they feel this way
  • Feels the immense love but is scared of it
  • A connection so strong that it is beyond their belief
  • Mostly can not believe that someone can possibly love them so much
  • Feel undeserving of the love
  • Low self esteem

What happens when your twin runs?

Many will run because of the symptoms described above, the leader needs to know that it is not because of them or that they have no feelings for each other.  I find typically the sleeper will go out in search of another so that they know for sure that they have found “the one.” I have explained all of this in my blog called the searching phase.  During this period of separation, the sleeper twin may meet their karmic relationship this is so that they can learn lessons to prepare for the ultimate union. This can be very hurtful to you but you have to keep in mind that they are in preparation for being with you. The sleeper twin will miss you and they will feel your love but still rejects the connection this is owing to the fact their are living in fear. Many will have had a very destructive past, perhaps being emotionally abused, a victim of bullying or have mostly had loved ones leave their lives without explanation. There may also be past life issues calling things to a halt. These are all issues that will have to be worked through before union can happen.

So how will the sleeper do this if they do not accept the relationship?

That is where you come in as the leader, firstly the reasons why the sleeper has left you will have to be discovered you can do this by having a reading or a consultation with myself. I have many tools that will help you to work out the right way forward for you and this ultimate love.  Of course every case is different so here are some tips that will help you deal with things.  

  • Reassurance: always reassure your twin that you love them, you will not leave and you will do your best to be there for them no matter what.
  • Friendship: offer the hand of friendship without asking anything in return
  • Be there for your runner when he/she needs you (believe they will many times)
  • Work on self
  • Remember you mirror your twin, so your issues are mostly theirs, acceptance of this is a must.
  • Work on the issues that are holding you back therefore you will help twin
  • Fears that you will have, twin is most likely to have also
  • Try to have faith
  • Know that even though your twin is not with you it does not mean they are not thinking of you or missing you
  • Giving up is really not an option, (please do not mistake this with surrender)


At all times when dealing with the sleeper you have to remember that you are the stronger twin, you were chosen for this journey because you are strong. Only the strong will get to reunion.  


Some of the crazy things that the sleeper will do!

  • Pretend their phone is not working
  • Claim they have changed their phone number
  • Block you on social media
  • Try to avoid you if they see you in public
  • Say goodbye like they are going to leave you for good and then show up again the same day
  • Get mad if you agree with their want to leave you or if you tell them to go
  • Use dating websites
  • Do mean things to try and get you to leave them
  • Use hurtful words against you
  • Pretend they have many options when it comes to dating
  • Hide if you call over to their home
  • Blow hot and cold with their feelings, telling you how much they love you one minute and pretending you do not exist the next
  • Disappear for months without contact


So how do you keep your sanity while dealing with this?

I always advise that you work on yourself, find the time to write down your issues whether that is in the past or present. Knowledge is key, find out everything you can about what is going on. Why you are being treated like this. The more information you have the better.  Occupy your mind, take up a hobby, go dancing, watch good movies and go out and have fun with your friends. Do not sit at home waiting for him to come to you.  The sleeper twin is most likely to come back when you are busiest, happiest or you have found your soulmate.  Yes Murphy’s law right!! Make no error your sleeper will turn you whole life upside down and throw up emotions you thought you had suppressed or did not know existed in your world. So work them out, resolve things so that there are less obstacles in your way. No you are not losing it. What you feel is real. Also know that many will say that it is an obsession, that you are a stalker, none of this is true and of course if they knew what the twin flame journey was about this would never enter their heads. Only those who are ignorant to this would make such comments. Knowledge is everything.  What you are feeling is a soul connection, the divine and ultimate love.

                         This is for sure not a journey for the faint hearted.  

Please do not hesitate to contact me for more help with any of the above or any of my other blogs, I always strive to answer every email. direct message or Facebook inbox.

© Carol Mary 2016

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11 Comments
maxi
5/10/2016 14:06:13

Great read once again.very simply put...thanks a lot

Reply
Kimberley
5/10/2016 19:06:38

Great blog Carol. Change is coming based on the dream I told you about today.

Reply
Kathleen
5/10/2016 21:33:04

This is all very true…it resonates. Thank you Carol

Reply
Livia
1/26/2017 16:05:56

My tf blocked me on social media and doesn't answer messages. I have stopped texting him (i was doing so every...15-20 days just to let him know I still like him) after christmas. What bothers me most is that he seems to be open to everyone but me. When it comes to me he's locked down and I can feel it because of our connection. But I know he remembers me once in a while.

I can't totally stop trying to get through to him even knowing I should let go and trust the divine. I fear I might never reach that moment of illumination when I'm ok with the fact that he might not come back to my life, because I REALLY WANT HIM in my life.

please help I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should message him once in a while...send a picture...or...show up somewhere I know he will be (if I get that info) just so he see's me with my friends being happy, I really don't know, please help

Reply
Liya
11/22/2021 07:12:54

Hi Livia, I'm sort of new to the twinflame journey and wow it has been the most difficult year of my life. It's now the second time he has ghosted me. That was also something that really hurt me, the fact that he never gives up on people who he cares about and yet here I am always in his corner and without hesitation he just leaves like I meant nothing to him. Is it just me or do we all feel it tear us apart inside when his being sexual with someone else? I've since learned to forgive him for responding from a place of trauma. I don't know if he knows what's happening but I know I have a purpose to heal and decided I'm doing that with or without him because I can't have a wounded twinflame hell bent on destroying everything good in the world that will bring me down. I've accepted that I can't get him out of my head and that I'll always feel the pull and love him. During times where it's intense longing, it's usually him missing me and I choose a love song, if I have to cry then I do and then I allow the love to flow through me. You miss him because his not there and you also feel like you've lost your best friend and every future plan you made. I've found that hugging trees replaces that loss of connection so get in touch with nature as much as you can. Meditate and balance chakras often, release energies that aren't yours and you will start feeling his energy too. I'm also an empath so it's strong on my side. When you start feeling him, accept him because his a part of you and once you do, there won't be 3D longing because you'll be speaking to him through the energy you feel. I found that he somehow is always by my side with me. That takes missing him away. He keeps running, just got into a new relationship and yet he can't run from this.
I'd like to know, how did it pan out with you?

Reply
Carol Mary
11/26/2021 23:28:07

Hi Livia

Please send me along an email to reunitingcomesfromwithin@gmail.com so that we can discuss this comment further

Much Love

Carol Mary

Samantha Atkins
8/29/2019 20:51:10

Thanks for this article Carol.
I was sure I found my twin.
He ran pretty quick after we met. Allot of those explaining what a sleeper does. Sounds like him. He called me crazy an blocked me. Jumped into a relationship an did the phone thing before cutting me out. I came off as to strong... But I know I did everything right once we met. That will someday cross his mind the connection we had I know it will. An when I read more an more blogs I get a feeling of knowing I'm right... This one helped me. Most of all. The way I felt this whole time is clearly completely normal for twins. An for those who are still obsessing over there twin it's OK time will only Dial it down exspesh when it's early an ur excited about it. Then they run leaving u more hurt more obsessed more afraid of losing them an that's part of an abondonment issue u have to work on.. I know the more u read the more u work on urself the fears go away the obsession dyes down the fear of losing them goes away... An blocks are gone... I'd love a reading. To find out what owe personal journey for each other is. And if we do hold a future based off what was planned from the beginning.

Reply
Jon
9/27/2019 12:52:00

Hi carol I thoroughly enjoyed reading your article and resonated with so much- me and my twin flame have been in separation for ten months; to cut a long story short, I met her in a organisation I volunteered for back in January of 2018 she then left to work for another organisation in December of the same year due to how intense this connection became for her; I believe she is the runner here and couldn’t handle the emotions it brought up within her; I must admit the separation devastated me for many months, but has been a true blessing and gift as it’s allowed me to start healing all these wounds that I’ve neglected to look at, however a couple of months ago I started writing my twin flame experience on a forum; she started following me by using a false profile and started commenting on my posts, I suspected it was her through the energy I felt while connecting with her on this forum alongside the other synchronicities I had during this period; somewhere along the line I expressed my anger towards her via a message explaining my displeasure at her not having the courage to directly message me from her true identity; I would have genuinely appreciated her to express her true feelings for me as opposed to hiding behind a different alias. This is the reason I decided to block her and come off all social media as I cannot be bothered wasting my time with all these egotistical mind games that she seems to enjoy playing; I have better things to do with my Time such as focusing on myself and my own inner growth; the truth of the matter is I would love her to reach out to me from a genuine heart felt place and we could take it from there. Twin flame or not, as for being a chaser for so long I decided I decided to take my power back and start finding that union within myself; separation and ascension is not all rainbows and butterflies it’s painful beyond words to describe at times; it’s showing me not to be a martyr and allow anyone to walk all over you regardless of they are your Divine beloved or not;you have to put boundaries in place; the runner needs that space to stop running from whatever they are afraid to face, and likewise the chaser has to stop chasing and realise that they are already WHOLE AND COMPLETE X

Reply
Brittany
9/8/2020 09:56:37

So I'm going through this process need some questionss answered

Reply
Kelly
11/5/2021 18:02:28

My twin and I are in separation. He has entered into a relationship that has been for almost a year now. How should I feel? What should I do? Is he gone forever?

Reply
Carol Mary
11/11/2021 20:24:31

Hi Kelly

Please send me along an email to reunitingcomesfromwithin@gmail.com so we can have a chat about things!

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