Fanning The Flames Vol 10.9

Dating Others on your Twin

​ Flame Journey

Hi All, 

Welcome to October. There are some very interesting energies this month some things that really will astound you I’m sure of it.  

Dating others on your Twin Flame Journey

Should I try dating others? I often get asked this question and for some reason this week I was asked it at the very least 20 times, so I decided I would answer it here in case others have this question.

Often we are lead to want to date another because we feel lonely, fed up or just want someone to share our life with because our Twin Flames can often leave us feeling rejected. It is common in life to want to know what else is out there for us and even though we love our Twin Flames, when they are not coming home to you and you feel as though they are not doing anything to help your connection so that you can move forward together. So you look towards dating someone else, I mean what else can you do, you do not want to be alone forever right?

Here is what I tell my clients when they ask this question:

There are a few ways to look at this, you can go ahead and date someone else, I mean why should you be the only one not having fun. Right?

You are single, free to do what you want but you are only drawn to your Twin Flame. The doubts start to creep in, should I, should I not. I mean it is cheating right? Wrong, dating someone who is not your Twin Flame is not cheating if you are not in a committed relationship with your Twin Flame. It may feel as though you are being disloyal because your mind, body and soul feels like it belongs to them.

You make the decision to put yourself out there, but what happens when your Twin Flame does come back, they awaken to who you are to them, they are finally at the point, that you have been wishing and praying for, what now,  are you just going to drop the person you are dating and be with your Twin Flame? Is that fair to the person you are dating?

I personally feel that it is not honorable, as you are not considering the other person’s feelings, it is not right to let someone into your life and then have them feel the hurt of you just leaving them for someone else. Remember when your Twin Flame did this to you?

Or you can date and let the person know that you are not willing to make a commitment, that you just want some companionship. Is that a better way to do it?


Do you think that it is ok to date someone that you can not give your whole self to because you are in love with someone else?

What if you find that you fall for this other person, then you are in a real pickle right?

Why are you really being lead to date others?

The other way of looking at it is perhaps the universe is guiding you to date another, because there is a person out there who is meant to be part of your journey, that person is meant to teach you a lesson, an important one so you can move forward. That is very possible.

You found someone that you have made a connection with, perhaps this person is your soulmate.

There is a missing part of your life that you feel can only be filled by having someone to love, someone who can love you. That feeling of being wanted.

Perhaps there is someone out there, who will just accept you as you are, so that you no longer have to work through those painful emotions that being a Twin Flame will bring up. So for avoidance.

To show you how to trust in yourself, your gut instinct and to communicate with yourself effectively. To make an important decision and stick to it.

Also it could be to show you that there is no other person out there for you but your Twin Flame.  

Lastly you do not trust in your journey to union, you do not think it is going to happen and doubt has become your best friend.

How do you know which to choose?

In truth I can not answer this question for you, only you can do that really, but there are a lot of things to note before you make your decision.

Here are some questions I would  ask myself before I would decide what to do:

Why do I want to date?
Am I running from our connection?
Is this just for sex?
Why is this person being lead to me?
What will get from dating this person?
If I put myself in my Twin Flame’s shoes what would they do?
Is this my ego, am I butt hurt because I feel my Twin Flame rejected me?
Is this just to get the attention of my Twin Flame, make them feel jealous?
Will I be hurt?
Will it slow my union down?
Will my Twin Flame get hurt?
Will I hurt the person I wish to date?
Will this hinder my journey?
Will it cause issues when we do finally get together?

The answers to the above questions will help you to decide, I also strongly recommend writing a list of the pro’s and con’s to this.

This is a huge decision, are you going to be loyal to your Twin Flame or look for more?

Some Twin Flame teachers will advise you to not date, to not even consider it, like it is a capital Twin Flame sin. That you can not possibly get to union if you are with someone else.

Others will tell you to go ahead, why should your Twin Flame be the only one having fun.

It is also important to remember that if you are asking this question, you are looking for approval to do something that you are totally unsure of doing, of course this is because you are scared of the effects it will have on your Twin Flame and your union.

Will it delay union?

Yes and no, it can delay union if you have not completed what you are meant to learn from this person. Dating another has caused your Twin Flame to move further away from you as they feel that this is what makes you happy then so be it.

No because you were meant to learn from this person. They are an important part of your journey to union.

So again it is only something that you can answer.

It is important to note that your journey is personal to you, personal to your Twin Flame, no one can decide what is right for you, but you.

What did I decide?

I personally chose not to date anyone else, my reasons were, that I needed to be alone for a while, to learn who I am, to become independent, to know that I did not need another person to make me feel fulfilled in life. I wanted to be loyal to my Twin Flame and my journey towards union. I did feel that it would cause problems later on down the road for us. In the end this was the right decision for me and one that I felt the universe guided me to in the end.

No one Twin Flame relationship is the same, I have not come across any that are in the many years that I have been doing this work, is there similarities? yes, it is imperative to note that you can not compare yourself to others out there on their road to union because it simply will not help you, in fact it could make things a lot worse for you. Take what resonates with you, leave behind what does not.

I have also learnt that many of you will try to date, to only find that you can not date, that the universe has other ideas for you, each and every person you meet, it will not work out with them.

A whole bunch for you to consider today, I hope that this has answered your question and will allow you to do what is right for you, your Twin Flame and your union.  

If you have any further issues with this please feel free to contact me.

Maybe you need to learn to love yourself before you try to love another without condition ~ Carol Mary 2018

​

Mystical Month Ahead!

Energy Report for October

October is the tenth month so essentially that breaks down to 1 in numerology. But when you add the letters of the month’s name together you get a master number! That is 33 now that also will carry the attributes of the number 6 as well.

For the  astrology based energy and attributes October starts in the sign of Libra and ends in the sign of Scorpio. Libran energy is social and lively and friendly and it’s an energy that is really good for forming solid friendships and other partnerships. This is all about balance and so for you twin flames out there, this is a good time of the year to look at how you and your twin flame balance the energy and personality traits between you. The yin/yang in other words.  This is also a good time to seek justice, now I don’t mean to get all up in each other’s faces I mean calmly and with steady emotions talk about solving problems between you. Even if that is done in 5D and I can help with that and also with your earthly based twin flame connection in terms of handling the ups and downs between you.
As we head towards the end of the month, October 23rd, is when Scorpio energy begins to appear. Scorpio energy is very intense. It rules birth, death, sex, life and transformation.  This is a time of year as the weather changes and those of us above the equator head into wintertime. So the darkness is around longer, it bodes well as mentioned in blog 10.8 to start turning within to do your inner work. Not just spiritually but mentally and emotionally. This is a peak time to transform yourself and step into your authenticity! Sometimes the energy is so intense it could trigger a dark night of the soul in some people or perhaps a situation will trigger you to go deep into the dark of yourself and release the demons from within and free up that which has cluttered your mental, emotional and even spiritual energy for quite some time.
October Numerology

As mentioned we have essentially 3 numbers for the month of October and this makes for an interesting set of energies and such for us to consider.  As mentioned earlier 1, 6 and 33.

The number 1 is considered the Primal Force energy number in numerology. September was the 9th month of the year - blog 10.7 covered that and mentioned it was about endings and beginnings and connection with the greater community of the planet to serve humanity.  

The energy of October is one of determination, being a leader (do you hear me leader twin flames? - ask me how you can be a leader in your twin flame connection! -  become more self sufficient, independent and headstrong really this energy is about you becoming more of who you are meant to be by seeing the steps and ways to get there by doing your own research and planning on how to achieve what you want to achieve, be it small or large.  Also due to the number 6 also being part of this monthly energy, you will have the opportunity to learn how to nurture more, nurture yourself, others and learn how to become more compassionate towards yourself and others as well as learning what loving yourself and others unconditionally really means.

Parents and educators are also ruled by the number 6 so if you find an instinct to teach or instruct others now it may be a great time to look into that as well. Maybe volunteer at the library or school where your kids go.  I’m sure you’ll come up with something you can do. How about you pick something to teach your Twin Flame this month.

Now for the exciting number -- 33! This like the number six is about unconditional love, compassion and so forth but as a master number this is also about the master of healing energy - which means not only the energy of unconditional love but healing energies related to it.  Consider this to be the energy of the healing power of the universe that Source energy that lives within us all and it is one we need to always be aware of. The world and we as humans function much better in an energy of unconditional love and not one of hate.

As well, I see this Master 33 energy can also possibly relate to the energy of the 1 - the Primal Force - and the practice of self care and being healing to yourself and taking care of you. It’s ok to put yourself first and you should. If you don’t look after you then you certainly cannot look after everyone else in your world now can you?

Don’t forget that the 11th of each month I have services for that wonderful energy of that special twin flame number. If you’d like to always know what I’ve got going on with services, and specials for not just on the 11th, come join my Facebook group. It’s one of the best out there and very different and you’ll see why when you become a member.

Moon Musings

October 2nd is the last quarter moon phase and it resides in the sign of Cancer - which interestingly enough, the moon rules the sign of Cancer so this is going to be an intense energy. The last quarter moon is a time to wind down our intense energies felt during the waxing and full moon phases and turn within to prepare for the next influx of the building energies upon the arrival of the New Moon phase. You may find as we get closer to wintertime you will want to wind down much more and look at lessons learned this year so far, and how to take the challenges you’ve had in life and your twin flame journey and now see where, when and how to turn those around.  Ask me for guidance on that I can definitely help you and give you a better understanding of where to change your thinking and where to take action and do better or where to maybe wait on things and have more patience.

If you find this looking at all your challenges and such begins to sadden you too much, I really do have an understanding heart but you must realize I’m not necessarily going to go easy on you with guidance and tell you it’s ok just rest etc. Now is not the time for that. I want to change and shift your perceptions of your twin flame journey and how you see how you are in this world and help you become the best version of yourself that you can become in the present time.

October 9th is the new moon and this phase resides in the sign of Libra, the sign for the beginning of October. With this being the new moon the energies are more focused on Libra qualities that are not the most positive and learning to turn that into something that is.  Libran energies tend to be very flexible but there can be tendencies to be insincere or too eager to please or too eager to compromise. Libra energy doesn’t like things out of balance. What this speaks to me of is this. Learning what your boundaries are in relation to others and learning how to stick by them when you set them.

I can offer more on this to you if you wish to discuss it with me in an email. New moon energy is about creation and Libra energy is in love with love. Meaning you get what you give in relationships and for twin flames this couldn’t be more important. Don’t get all uppity about your twin flame or you’ll get that right back. Usually energetically in the form of mirroring situations.  So this is all about how things reflect on you and how you reflect on your own responses to situations between you. Responding rather than simply reacting. Step back and think don’t just be impulsive and react.

October 16th is the first quarter moon phase and it resides in the sign of Capricorn. This is where you’re going to most likely have strong external challenges but knowing where and when they’re coming so you can handle them accordingly.

The energy of Capricorn thrives on challenge and success of getting through them and it’s not a highly charged emotional moon phase when in this sign. It is a more reserved, self controlled and cautious energy. In other words it’s ok to go s-l-o-w-l-y and with determination and make the right decisions at the right time rather than jumping from the frying pan into the fire if you know what I mean?!

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This is a good year for uniting twin flames and I am very honored to aid you on your road to reunion.

“Look inside yourself, become the best version of you, reuniting comes from within.”~ Carol Mary

​Please do not hesitate to contact me for more help with any of the above or any of my other blogs, I always strive to answer every email, direct message or Facebook inbox.


Take a chance, make a change, unite! ~ Carol Mary

©Carol Mary 2018. ©Reuniting comes from within  All Rights Reserved. No part of copyrighted material may be used, altered or copied in any way without the express written permission of the copyright owner