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Carol Mary
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Soul Guidance with Carol Mary

Here you will find all the information you need on love, twin flame love and life

The Searching Phase

4/15/2016

17 Comments

 
Many clients come to me and ask, why is my twin flame on dating sites, looking for hookups on Facebook or throwing it right in my face that they want a date?  Why are they putting themselves out there and looking for someone else when they have already found me?

The answer is a long and complicated one that not many understand.  They find hurtful so I am going to try to make it simpler to understand. It is never easy to comprehend why your beloved finds it necessary to find someone else.  You will find yourself asking questions like, what is wrong with me?  Am I not good enough?  Did he not find me interesting or attractive enough? Did he not feel the same things as I did. In truth yes he did, but he could not believe that he was lucky enough to find you and wants to make sure that it was in fact true.

I aptly call this the searching phase. It is when your other half goes out in search of reality.  They want to make sure that they have found their one by seeing if others will even compare.  It is a runner instinct to do so, the runner may be running but they are also in search of truth as they do this!!

They may revisit old relationships, and try to figure out why it did not work with that person. Once again they will find out the reasons why,  your runner will realize this and know that it  will work with no other.  Now will come the time where they will make contact with you again.

This searching for another will hurt you very much, and make you ask the question how can this person be my beloved, the other half of my soul.  If they were,  they would not do this to me. In fact they are doing this for you, so they know when entering a relationship with you,  your runner will never find it necessary to look for another, they will know 100% that you are the one for them. Some of you might argue that this should be known from the beginning but I will state that past hurts cause runners to act how they do. (That is a story for another day!)

So how do you get through this phase, how do you deal with the hurt your runner causes you?

Many work on themselves, find other interests.  Some wallow in self pity and wonder all about how they are not good enough. Some twins meet someone else in the hope they can forget about their runner twin, this one never works out either.

What I suggest for you to do, is accept what your twin is doing and the reason why. Work on yourself, look at your faults and failings, not an easy task I know so contact me and I can help you deal with this phase and how to move forward with the least hurt possible.

If I could offer any advice or words of wisdom on what I call the searching phase is that you know that they will not find another like you no matter how far they look, and know that you are good enough and that you are special, unique and not like anyone else!!


​© Carol Mary 2016
Visit www.reunitingcomesfromwithin.com to subscribe
17 Comments
Kimberley
4/15/2016 21:28:25

LOVED IT!

Reply
maxi
4/16/2016 00:36:42

Found this a good read..very useful.

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Angel
4/16/2016 08:18:42

I found this very useful

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Love Jones
4/16/2016 23:30:14

Beautifully written...

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Carol Mary
4/17/2016 00:22:50

Thank you so much xx

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Holly
4/17/2016 21:14:15

Another great read once again! I really enjoy your articles xx

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Tammy Lynn Williams
7/22/2016 14:32:15

Perfect Timing. I am going through this now with my Twin. Thank you for this information, Carol. It has really put things into a healthy perspective for me.

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Lisa
9/25/2016 09:16:20

Extremely helpful, made me cry a little (I think bc sometimes truths are just that powerful). Your writings are deeply profound and very much needed. Bright Blessings )O(

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Kimberly Ritchel
1/18/2017 18:41:17

Thanks Carol i needed This! Very very helpful. I just love You Carol <3

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Richard Strom
7/3/2017 21:25:59

Thank You, don't you think that she has searched enough already??

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Carol Mary
7/3/2017 22:01:40

Yes I would feel at this point that she has....

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Jayne
7/5/2017 11:18:51

I'm guessing that the waiting stage, and not knowing how long it will take, is the most difficult thing.
I have been told by 2 readers that he is my twin flame. I feel the connection and I hope that he does too. This separation is so painful but I know that I must be strong. Thank you for your posts that are bringing me comfort.

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Carol Mary
7/5/2017 18:15:00

Thank you so much Jayne, I am sorry to hear that you are in separation at this time. You are so very welcome and if you need someone to talk to or some help getting you through things please send me an email to reunitingcomesfromwithin@gmail.com

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Kimberley
3/11/2018 21:37:06

One thing I am not sure you covered is when they find someone that is very much like you in many ways you look the same or similar except the intensity of the relationship the energy is not the same... this is because they're looking for the "safer" version of you so they can be more comfortable ..

Yes?

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sab
3/29/2018 11:25:09

This hit so home.

Thank you for sharing.

The thoughts in my head of how he should have known, or if it was real he would be waiting, or that he wouldn't have emotional space for anyone else. I have to remember this isn't just about me, and love him through his journey, too.

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Carey Brock
6/15/2018 21:37:41

But how long do they have to search? Mine has been searching for a year and a half. We are currently in seperation with no communication.

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Violet link
4/10/2019 02:44:39

I hope this reply isn’t too long. Every word of what Carol has said is true! However, I am a person of deep faith. The pain of his searching face has been lessened by signs God has given me from total strangers, including his deceased mother. All have told me he will return by the end of this year. An example of a sign- when griping at a Comcast Cable employee, she asks out of the blue where I go to church...she goes to the same one. She tells me God has a word for me- I am the light of that man’s life. When in a store, helping an elderly woman get towels off a lower shelf..we chat a few mins, b4 she walks off, she stares at me and says That man is going to want to marry you...then wishes me a good day. In another store talking about makeup with an 85 yr old, she says, He thinks you’re absolutely adorable and loves you like no other! Rose, his deceased mother, begs me not to give up on him, he’d be a fool to lose me. She wants him to be happy, that’s why she doesn’t want me to give up. Btw, I’ve never talked to the dead before. And, although he’s not into spiritual stuff, he’s never questioned my contact with Rose. He knows it’s real. She’s doing her best to talk to him thru his dreams. But, he’s stubborn as hell and is resisting with all his might. He doesn’t think he wants a relationship, especially one this intense. We met two years ago. During that time neither of one met anyone compared to us. Neither of one is dating anyone else. But I’m fighting health issues, and he’s fighting deep emotional issues. However, I know when we’ve both healed, we’ll come together and be eac others love of our lives. Rose told me it will happen by the end of the year. She’s been rifhtvon everything so far, so I have no reason to disbelieve her. Oh even a prayer partner told me two weeks ago, Eose is right...you are the love of his life. He’s just not ready to accept, but know he will. And, I’m going to pray that he will by the end of the year.

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