Why I Will Never Surrender
First of all, I would like to say a big thank you to Carol for allowing me to share this with you. I appreciate it very much.
I have been on my twin flame journey about 4 years now.. Started year 5 at the beginning of September 2017. A little background for you, I met my twin flame through Twitter, though at the time not having a clue about twin flames whatsoever, I had no idea why he felt special or important to me when our paths crossed in May of 2013, when his account began to follow mine. I eventually got my insight through Carol after experiencing things I didn’t understand. Now of course we never did get to discuss any of this, what we are to each other. Our 3D never really got beyond “chit chat”, and it was unfortunately due to someone else, out of spite or jealousy or complete misunderstanding of this dynamic, they decided to butt their nose in and tell him things. Which caused him to do the typical sleeper twin thing and freak out and then block me on Twitter and “disappear” in 3D. I have learned a lot since then. Both about myself and this journey with him and thanks to Carol learned more about him from his higher self, through her.
This being said our soul connection/5D is VERY strong and with Carol’s help I KNOW this is changing and we’ll be in contact and on our way to union. I trust in her and in the energy and in the other work I’m doing to help myself and our union. Ok so let’s get down to the real reason I’m here talking with you all, what I feel a leader twin flame is!
What I Feel A Leader Twin Flame Is!
Now after all I have told you, you’re sitting there thinking.. WHAT?! She’s not surrendered, not let go, not given up or walked away from this whole thing considering how difficult it has been? I say no way.. Why ? I was made for this!
There are many twin flame “gurus”/teachers who aren’t in union that constantly speak of these are things you’ve got to do in order to get to union, meaning surrender, let go etc… Otherwise supposedly it is ego stuff.. I call B.S.!
Here is what I’ve discovered.. Back in the day when I read blogs from those not in union it never once sat well with me to surrender, or let go, or do anything like that. By definition I have thought surrender as far as twin flames meant that you say ok this is entirely out of my hands, I can’t do anything, I’ve done all I can, come what may and so be it and I’ll deal with it then.
That felt so wrong to me… I couldn’t resonate with it. So I talked to Carol and she told me that means you aren’t supposed to do it, you’re not supposed to let go or surrender or any of that. Then she said that I was a leader twin flame. That did feel right to me.
I realized that I am not to give up, I am not to let go, surrender, or walk away or even follow the path of other twin flames. What I am here to do is blaze my/our own trail to twin flame union.
How is that you may wonder?
If you do not do that you’ll remain on that hamster wheel for twin flames of doom and gloom. I have learned all too well we do this to our own selves regardless of what is going on in 3D. That is the other thing. I had to force myself to change my view of a few things, including how I walk this journey.
I had to change how I view my twin flame/sacred partner, for he is doing what he needs to do and this isn’t easy for him, regardless of what the 3D world might look like or that I perceive it to be.. It isn’t real! You as a conscious being and that includes me, we don’t truly have a clue as to what is going on in 3D with them until they are willing to tell you. So accept what you intuitively pick up as truth because their higher self is their truest self.
As a leader twin flame it is our job to be the strong one, and to love our sleeper twin regardless of what our logical minds perceive or sees going on. Meaning no blame, no judgement, they are as we are, only humans evolving at the soul level for the sake of our union. This is what unconditional love is…
You need to go beyond mere belief and mere trust to having an emotional knowing in your heart and your entire being that your union is manifesting.. I don’t mean some pie in the sky feeling with rose coloured glasses. I mean deep down honest unshakeable at the core belief. I have never been there until now.. It took some work but honestly now.. I know it like I know my own breath.
Carol has helped me get this far to where I am and where I am in my connection with my twin flame. I still had to do the work and am still doing work in order to stay in the leader zone. She and I agree that what I’ve been doing working with her and another twin flame teacher/healer that Carol knows I’ve been working with and how this all has brought me and our connection very far indeed. So she said keep doing it!
I appreciate your taking some time to read my story.
How My Twin Flame Changed My Life
Imagine, being little. Just knowing that you're different. I remember (and still do it) living inside of my own head, figuring out the meaning of things. When I was little, I used to dream of love being so beautiful and romantic.
When I was 8, I lost my grandma suddenly. As much as I missed her, that's when my gifts started. I started seeing the people who would come into my life. I even saw how many children I would have. It was when I was about 10/11 that I started to feel the magnetic pull of someone who was out there for me. At that age,I couldn't describe it other than we were similar and had the same background. It always stayed with me.
As a teen, I tried to get into spirituality, but really just couldn't. I had a lot of problems as a teen. Deep down I had this longing. Again, I had this feeling that my other half was out there. I just needed to be patient. During this time, I had met one of my soul mates and upon meeting him, saw our future together. Everything came to pass.
At 18/19,I did a lot of inner reflection and that whole other half thing? Yeah, I met him, but didn't know it was him at the time. I was too shy and insecure to do anything. Which led me to another soulmate. Fast forward, I had had my oldest son and his dad and I split.
One day, I happened to be on MySpace. I saw this guy and my first thought was "he's mine!!!" Funny thing is, I'm not that kind of person. We became friends. I got back with my son's dad and got pregnant. 7 months pregnant and we had to move. Ended up moving to the town where my twin lived. I comforted myself by thinking, well, I'll get to know twin. A few years later we became friends on Facebook. I was still caught up in fear. I didn't think I was pretty enough, etc. Our conversations always flowed. Then one day, I started working out. Building my confidence. Posting my pictures that he ended up liking.
And then it happened.
It was surreal, us finally being together. All of my self doubts and insecurities melted away when I was in his arms. Everything led me to that moment and for that I wouldn't change a thing. Even it taking as long as it did to find out about twin flames.
Here is how my twin has changed me. Self doubts and insecurities are ok, but don't let it control you,or you'll find yourself missing out on a lot. I learned it's ok not to rush into anything, timing is key. I made my twin wait two months before getting together with him. Trust in the Universe and trust your gut. I've opened up to my twin and he's done the same. By following my instinct. He's definitely gotten me out of my comfort zone, which has helped me (and him) to grow into better people. His faith in me is unwavering. He's always been and continues to be supportive of me and what I do. My twin has taught me how to not take everything in life so seriously. And unconditional love. How to love him and to love myself as well.
A World Of Change
Feb 1, 2010.
This is the day my life changed for the better, the day my twin and I literally ran into each other
while passing through a doorway. I knew of him prior to that day, but never really gave him a
second glance. He sang at one of our local bars, and was friends with mutual friends of mine.
My daughter was in the final running for a singing contest he was judging.
I went through many times of him saying that he couldn't do it anymore, him running, me always
asking why, neither one ever really understanding why it was so difficult to turn and walk away.
Not until he came to me after being with him for 4 years, telling me he had feelings for another
woman did it finally hit home. All the insecurities, all the “ what's wrong with me?” But still even though he was trying to build something with her, he couldn't walk away from me.
This is when I got into crystals again and actually studied different ones and how they heal. Reiki was introduced to me, I learned it and became a level 2 practitioner. I learned to heal my “ hurt” through the energy of the divine. I also got the chance to try it on my twin. This started my more expansive spiritual journey.
I was raised a Lutheran, but the only thing that resonated and stuck with me was unconditional love and my want to perfect it. I also had a fascination with the yin yang and together they go hand in hand. Something radically clicked and I wanted to use this energy healing, and since I would rub his neck and back, massage school called to me. This is my mission found through him 7 years later..
But how has he changed me? From each falling out we had I learned how to look inside myself first, to see what happened in my life that may cause me to feel the way I did. Vary rarely did I “ blame” him, but sought out information to try to understand. Twin flame wasn't even a thing for me till he took off with her. We always felt a special connection, something spiritual. He has taught me and shown me beauty in everything. A man with a keen eye who can see beauty in a mud puddle… his pictures are amazing, not only of things around him, but of me too.
He has accepted in me things that I had troubles accepting, and that gave me a stronger sense of self, a push to be better, do better. He has shown me the meaning of gratitude. Never have I ever had a man thank me after having relations, and like clockwork every time I was thanked. I used to wonder why would anyone thank someone for something that was considered yours… It took me a long time to realize that nothing is truly “ ours” and thanking your partner shows how much you appreciate that they took time for you, they chose you, it's not a right, but a privilege and can be taken away at a moment's notice.
I am a better woman from his generosity, this journey has prompted me to seek and further my spirituality. Has prompted me to open up to my true authentic self through love. Not to mention all the many relationship gurus I spent money on to learn how to speak from the heart and not from fear. This continues to be a work in progress. LOA (law of attraction) has also been important in learning my vibration, and recognizing those around me with a lower vibration, continuous complaining and gloomy outlook on things. I know with continued practice I can do it. My latest endeavor is learning imago therapy and praying to be able to implement it in the near future.
Acceptance = no judgment = unconditional love = freedom. No matter what stage I or my twin is in.
A Few Words From Carol Mary
Thank you so much for taking the time to read these stories, they are all true to life and written by some of the members in our Facebook group, Reuniting Comes From Within. This group is like a family, we share our hurts and our triumphs, there is no judgement here and no ego squabbles, we all have one common goal and that is to get to union and to stay in union!
www.facebook.com/groups/reunitingcomesfromwithin/ click here if you would like to join but please answer the questions as you can not be accepted if this is not done!
Would you like to share your story with others? You can of course do this anonymously. Part of our twin flame journey is learning from others, how did they get to union, how is their journey progressing, what can you gain from reading about what they have done!
One thing I have noticed is that the best people to learn from are united twin flames, they got to union because they went through everything they needed to do so to get to union, I took all my advice from a united twin flame, sadly this person has passed away now but he was my rock on my road to reunion. Align yourself with united twin flames, learn and grow, listen, watch and heed what is going on and you will soon figure out what you need to do!
If you have any questions for Kimberley, Brandi or Tara please use the comment section and I am sure they will be very happy to answer!!
Always remember that Reuniting Comes From Within!!
Contact me at: email@example.com
Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/reunitingcomesfromwithin/
This is a good year for uniting twin flames and I am very honored to aid you on your road to reunion.
“Look inside yourself, become the best version of you, reuniting comes from within.”~ Carol Mary
Please do not hesitate to contact me for more help with any of the above or any of my other blogs, I always strive to answer every email, direct message or Facebook inbox.
Take a chance, make a change, unite! ~ Carol Mary
Carol Mary xx
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Carol Mary's thoughts on love and this journey we call life!