You asked ~ I along with the help of sleepers answered!
So two weeks ago I was asked if I would do a question and answer session from the sleepers point of view, of course this was a really great idea and I am happy to help. Here are all of the questions group members came up with! Many things the sleeper does are nonsensical, we struggle to understand why they do what they do, so I hope that this blog will help you to understand better what is going on.
Why won't he give me any signs here in the 3d other than screw you I would rather have her?
This is a very interesting question, I am feeling that he has not physically said that to you, however his actions are telling you that he is not ready for union, it may not be that he would rather be with her, but she is a lesson for him, preparing for union with you!
Why do they fall out of love?
Your sleeper (runner) twin flame does not ever fall out of love with you although it may seem as though they do because of their words and or actions. You must remember at all times that this is a learning process and while in separation we are always learning and growing to become the best version of ourselves so yes at times it may look as though they do not love you because of lack of communication or being in a relationship with another but that is never the case.
Why would he work to push me away?
Your twin flame is not working to push you away, he is in fact scared, scared of the intensity of the relationship. It can feel as though he is doing all he can to get away from you when in fact he is trying to work out exactly what your relationship to him is because a connection like this will fill the strongest person with fear nevermind a sleeper who has no clue why he feels what he does.
I spoke to a sleeper twin flame about this and they said “ When I first met lady a, she was the best thing that ever happened to me, I was so happy I felt like I could burst, then all of a sudden things started to get serious and the intensity was so extreme, I started to have feelings like I was not good enough for her, she deserved better than me so I left her and I did not come back until I realized that I would never experience love like this again and that she was the only woman for me! That realization took me 2 years”
Why does the runner hit and run text you, forget how to talk or make plans then never pull through?
The hit and run texts are simply because while they are a bundle of fear, full of self esteem issues and perhaps working on let’s just say trust, they have to know that you are ok, so they text, find out how you are doing, perhaps even go as far as making plans and then run. The most common thing is is checking in with you and making sure that you will still talk to them or met them, no matter what they have done.
Why does he keep contacting me even though he’s with someone?
When you think about the twin flame connection, you think of two souls joined as one, he is not with the right one so he will need to reach out to you more and more so that he can feel fulfilled in life, this is something that he only gets from you so he will continue to check in with you. Embrace it and show him the way!!
Why do they run judging you based on how much money you have, what others say, What their friends think???
Sleeper twin flames are not on the same level as us, they do not have unconditional love or the values that they need to possess to be in this type of relationship, that is why we/they have such harsh lessons to get them to where they will not judge you on anything and not care what others think of their relationship with you!
Why do we have the most amazing time and then nothing....doesn’t call or anything?
This is a tough one to answer because you would really have to be inside the head of your sleeper to get this answer, but it is a very great question, I posed this one to a sleeper that is now fully awakened and this is what they said:
“I have had the most amazing and magical times with my twin flame and then I would leave and go back to my normal life, I say normal because there was nothing normal about being with her, she would bring out feelings that were out of this world. The whole relationship I had with her felt way too good to be true, so in order to protect myself I would tell myself that it was not real, therefore when she left me and realized I was nothing special it would hurt me less, so I would keep my distance.”
I also feel that it can be a learning curve for them, come together, learn a lesson then pulled apart again once more to go about becoming the best version of oneself.
What is with the nonchalant attitude like they despise and hate you in 3D and you are a nuisance?
This is simply to push you away. The sleeper has so many issues to work through they can get overwhelmed but instead of asking you for the help they need to deal they push you away, act like you do not exist or they can be very hurtful in their words or actions, it is a lesson for you in unconditional love. A harsh one I know but the universe is testing you!!
How you deal with that test is up to you, it can go one of two ways, you can forgive them for this behavior or you can allow it to continue and show unconditional love which I know goes against all beliefs. It is a hard road.
Is it possible my twin is not running, but simply just moved on with his life and it’s my ego that is bruised?
I put this question to an awakened sleeper twin flame and this is what he had to say:
“Your ego is bruised but your twin flame is running as hard and as fast as he can go, all because he fell in love with you more than his mind could cope with it. They do somewhat move on with their life it is easier for them in the beginning as they are obvlious but soon enough, as they learn and grow they will see that they have made a huge mistake, I for sure know that I did.”
Why is my runner OK with never talking to me again? Although he wants to talk to me. The effort is non existent. And it makes little sense. Because I hold him to the standard to be as strong as I am. When talking could solve like years of bs and wasted like. Heck an hour convo would work! Instead of wasting more time.
Two things here, you have answered your first question within the question, and you have made a mistake holding your twin flame to be as strong as you are.
The answer was he is not ok with never talking to again as you figured out yourself when you said although he wants to talk to me.
Holding your sleeper to be as strong as you is not wise because you have to remember that on this journey they are more than a few miles behind you, they have to still learn to become as strong as you!!
Do the runners run even during a separation?
Yes, they run from their feelings and they run from the connection.
Why does the runner not seem to care at all about the pain they are causing, like they think it's okay to bounce in and out of your life whenever THEY want, knowing that you are always going to be available to them?
This is a very good question and I put it to my twin flame as he used to do this to me and this was how he answered:
“This was something that I did quite a lot, I did not ever want to hurt Carol Mary but I know I did cause her great pain, I did not do that knowingly, I was dealing with my own crap and while doing that I forgot about how much she helped me, I would go be by myself for days or weeks and all the while wonder how she was doing. When I realized what I was doing it was too late, she had left me and she did stay gone for 9 months, she said that it was for the best as she could not take anymore hurt from me, that was a huge wake up call because it was then I knew that she would not always be available to me and when I grew the most as a person and a twin flame.”
Where or when can we separate twin flame reactions with personality?
This question got me thinking because I was wondering why it was asked because it seems to me that we all have our own personalities then I realized that you were asking how can we separate their feelings that we feel from our own personality.
The answer to this is you will know when it is your own feelings because you can fully work out what is going on. When things seem a little hazy and you can not quite put your finger on it at first you will know that this is your twin flame. Take a moment concentrate on what you are feeling, see if you can figure out what the issue is, it will come to you if you sit in silence. Then you can send the energies needed and you should note the feelings dissipating.
Does runner have also those intense fears of losing you, that he has to face in certain situations?
Oh yes, the sleeper has serious fears about losing you that most often they protect their own heart by leaving first, again makes no sense, they do end up being put in certain situations so that they can learn and see that it is ok to give someone all of their heart.
How can the runner cope with the idea not to be with twin ?
It depends on what part of their journey they are on, if it is early days they cope and put it down to a very intense encounter. However when it is later on and the relationship has progressed they are just as hurt as you, they can just hide it better, so the answer really is that they do not cope with it.
Why do you wait last minute or have trouble communicating with us?
It is not so much trouble communicating as if I text or call late it will not hurt me so much if they say no. All of this is a way of coping.
Why does it feel and look like we never will happen...that he is in ignoring.. silence.. that it looks he does not love and does not want me ever?
This can mean that he is in total denial about the relationship, it does not mean he does not love you, he does not care for you, it means that he has a block when it comes to being with you. That can be a lesson that he refuses to face or someone who stands in your way. Either way it will be resolved but I do understand it is very hard to keep the faith when it looks like it is never going to happen. That will teach you true strength and patience.
Do they get the signs like we do? The reminders of the connection?
Yes but they may not see as many as you do because they are not as aware and awakened as you. It can be in the form of music or seeing your name, I do know that many sleepers have told me the numbers, 8, 7 and 11 were commonplace.
Why does the runner start a fight or attacks when everything is going great in the relationship?
This is usually a reaction to a trigger that day that pushes them back to a time when they would run out of fear. Instead of talking to you about what is going on they will start an argument as a test of your love, if you stay you pass, if you leave well then they will think that you never truly loved them like you said you did. It is a form of self sabotage also.
Why does My TF go from hot to cold, and mostly distant?
This comes with all the ups and downs of what the universe is throwing at you, when things are hot, it means that they are comfortable in their skin around you, they are secure and know that everything will be ok. When cold and distant it means that there was something thrown in their path that has once again made them question everything about the connection. All you can do when this is going on is be as supportive as they can and in a way ignore some of their wishes not to talk to you.
What do you think happens to the runner that makes them realize that their twin is the one? Signs from the universe? A dream? Something in their Cracker Jacks? I believe I've been both the runner & chaser. Not sure what I am now?
You did answer the question within the question. Yes it can be signs from the universe, a dream that they have. The most common answer I get is that everything was leading me to this person so I knew there was just no way I could live my life without them, that was the realization that changed their life and for the better.
It is very possible to be both the sleeper and the leader. I know that many struggle with this as at times they just want to stop, stop feeling like they are in love with someone who does not show the same love back, so they try to distance themself from the relationship but what you must remember no matter what your twin flame is always with you, in your heart and soul, they never truly leave you!!
I do hope that this answers your questions if you have any further questions or would like to see more information like this please do not hesitate to contact me.
Contact me at: firstname.lastname@example.org
Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/reunitingcomesfromwithin/
This is a good year for uniting twin flames and I am very honored to aid you on your road to reunion.
“Look inside yourself, become the best version of you, reuniting comes from within.”~ Carol Mary
Please do not hesitate to contact me for more help with any of the above or any of my other blogs, I always strive to answer every email, direct message or Facebook inbox.
Take a chance, make a change, unite! ~ Carol Mary
Carol Mary xx
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Carol Mary's thoughts on love and this journey we call life!